Kindly remove your wrench from my gears

#ThePowerOfPositiveThinking

I’m not going to lie. My moods, interests and goals fluctuate a little bit. Scratch, that. They fluctuate A LOT.

But recently, while preparing to record an episode of the critically acclaimed¹ #WorstFriends Podcast, which I host with my friend Colin, I had a breakthrough.

I realized that things were actually starting to break my way, a little bit. Good things appeared to be happening to me.

A big part of this realization was due to the presidential election coming to a close (Obama winning definitely made me feel better, too). Over the past several years, I have grown into a political junkie. By 2008, I was basically shooting Keith Olbermann’s over-the-top animated lefty angst directly into my veins. The addiction culminated in my own foray into the children’s carnival known as politics in 2010, and since then I’ve been trying to ignore politics and all it encompasses.

Being a journalist makes that freakin’ impossible, by the way. Not to mention, watching TV in the SuperPAC era is like being beaten over the head with campaign brochures and candidate sings until your ears bleed and your brain is permanently scrambled. Seriously, in 2016, I’m just going to lie in the middle of the street. All you billionaires paying for all these commercials, just walk on up and kick me in the balls.

Or die. That’d be acceptable too.

Back to the matter at hand, though. The election is over. All of the stupidity and animosity surrounding it can be left in the past. This made me happy, and I decided to run with that. Instead of dwelling on the negative, I decided to make positive changes and started shedding negativity. I started going to the gym again. I stopped drinking pop on weekdays (You gotta let your hair down on the weekend). I unfollowed Skip Bayless² on Twitter, I’m attending classes through Michigan Works on starting a business (which I intend to use for the podcast and some of my other projects down the road). And of course, I got a new phone — an iPhone — which, to be honest, has really helped turn the tide for me.

All of this progress, though, was in serious jeopardy of crashing down recently. After editing #WorstFriends 24, I tried uploading it to our hosting site. We were out of disk space. I still don’t believe we really used up all of said space, but there’s really nothing I can do. I sent an email³ to the host, and they did respond the following day with the typical, unsatisfactory “It’s not us, it’s you” response that you get any time you complain via email.

What happened after the failed attempt at publishing the podcast was pretty sad. Like a stereotypical sad, middle-aged, single woman, I sat on the couch and ate.

Not a lot⁴, but it was at like 11:30 p.m. And with the food I drank about 30 ounces of Faygo Moon Mist. When I was about halfway through the late-night depression dinner, I looked down and was kind of ashamed of myself. That didn’t stop me from finishing both the soup and soda, but at least I realized that I was coping with my disappointment in an unhealthy manner, right?

Anyhow, I’m about 30 minutes away from my first session in “starting a business for Dummies”, so I’m going to wrap this up by whoring ouy all of my social media information. Follow me on Twitter @timbarnum, and follow the #WorstFriends on Twitter @WorstFriendsPod. Like us on Facebook, and please, please, pleeeeeeeaaasssse listen to the damn thing! Colin and I put our heart and soul (we actually share a heart and soul) into it, and you know you love us. You can listen here (the devil aka podbean) or here (iTunes). We would really appreciate some feedback. And an audience. Mostly an audience.

Sorry again about the delay in the podcast, and the self-pity I just shared. But I’m an open book baby! See that on my sleeve? That’s my heart. I don’t know where else to keep it. Never have, never will.

By the way, here’s my first #WorstFriends preshow monologue. I recorded it on my iPhone with an app called Spreaker. Listen to it, and feel overcome with anticipation while you wait for #WorstFriends 24.

Pax vobiscum.

1

Code for “no one has heard of it.”
2 Not having to read about his Tebow love and LeBron hate has definitely reduced under-the-breath cursing, eye-rolling and exasperated sighs. Try it. Unfollow this prick.
3 Has anyone ever filed an email complaint and gotten results? If so, please tell me about the great customer service on Planet Tattooine. It sounds like a great story!
4 It was a bag of ramen noodles, not a pint of Ben and Jerry’s, by the way.